Friday, July 27, 2012

Retracing Summer's End

Today is my last real day of summer vacation. The weekend will be filled with Italian summer homework (watching movies with friends, I'm not complaining) and band staff, and then on Monday band camp starts! Excited about that - my team captain and I are already planning on converting freshmen to the lower brass.

I've been thinking about how to best spend the rest of today. For guidance, I went back to my confidantes (the term I prefer to diaries) for the past two years. What did I do on the Friday before band camp?

Freshman year: we moved to our current place. Yeah, not repeatable (though I do want to think about redecorating my room a little).

Sophomore year: working on TUP in the morning (check), eating lunch, going on a walk in the local park and planning how I will keep my soul during the school year, practicing euphonium, going on Tumblr.

Hm. Sounds good (though I will stay off Tumblr).

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"Planning how I will keep my soul."

See this post.

Sophomore year was much better for creative output than freshman year. I read a lot of books, I wrote a lot, and I...I sketched a little. I still had good grades and I stayed with my friends. I got really good at euphonium.

What do I want to be junior year?

My soul-searching will happen in the park, among the sheaves of golden sun. But I know this:

1. I'm probably going to finish revising TUP next week.
2. I want to learn how to program.
3. I'm not going to like my humanities classes very much.
4. I'm going to write a lot anyway because English teachers cannot keep me down.

The summer is ending, but I? My great work still lies before me. As I did last summer, I will go on a strategy retreat with me, myself, and I to plan how I can Be Myself when the pressures of junior year, and the whole college/SATs/etc. rat race really gets started.

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Kindly indulge my vainglory.

I am better than the juniors last year who collected standardized testing stats and freaked out over AP classes and think they'll die if they don't get into Stanford.

I am better than my mother thinks I am, and the SAT is not the most important thing in my life.

I am a Chinese girl but my intelligence must be measured by the depth of my thoughts and how well I can convey them, not how many tiny little bubbles on my Scantron don't have marks next to them.

I'm going to take the SAT word book my sister gave me and use it to write short stories.

When most of the rest of my class is daydreaming about a 2400 on the SAT I'm going to daydream about the villa in which I'll live when I retire (it's going to be awesome. As soon as I write down the details, I'll share them here).

Dear school system,

I am not your drone.

Sincerely,

Future Author/Engineer

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Summer's ending but my mind is still full of magic and I still see things in terms of story. Do things with defiance and do them with joy.

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